There is this paradox within the busy streets of Indian cities and the quiet lanes of its villages. Among the over 1.4 billion people who surround these Indians, there exists this unprecedented wave of loneliness that has beset them. This emotional state, once branded a Western phenomenon, quietly slid into the fibers of Indian society, cutting across ages, classes, and geography.
What is Loneliness?
Loneliness is much more than a feeling of being alone. It is complicated and subtle, and painfully so when someone experiences all this disconnection when in dire need of meaningful relationships. It is jarringly disturbing to experience all of this, especially in the Indian context when our tradition has been a weld between living in unison, welded family units. A person living today in a twelve member joint family can feel just as lonely as a single person living alone in an apartment in a metropolitan city.
It is important to note here that loneliness is quite different from solitude. While solitude is a conscious state of being alone and can, in fact, be refreshing, loneliness is an unwanted emotional pain born out of the cause of isolation, being misunderstood, or failing to feel on the same wavelength as others.
The Many Faces of Loneliness in India
Causes of loneliness in India run into as many varied faces as the Indian population, intricately woven into our rapidly changing social tapestry:
Urbanization and Migration
This is typically the history of young professionals, who are looking for greener pastures away from their homesteads, and thus end up in cities unknown. They can’t provide adequate space in their lives for people to mean anything to them in life.
They end up with professional acquaintances and social media connections instead of the neighborhood aunties and childhood friends.
Changing Family Structures
The number of joint families has now become very rare, and nuclear families have taken the most convenient seat. Emotional gaps were created because elderly parents started staying alone while the children are away working elsewhere. This great support system that supported emotional sustenance is now slowly being eroded.
Digital Disconnect
Indians rank among the world’s highest users of social media, and most people provide sensational contents of their lives that create more of an illusion of connection rather than a bond. Endless scrolling through highlighted moments in others’ lives can deepen feelings of isolation, and perhaps this lies at the root of many fears and anxieties, including the fear of failure – a common challenge that crops up during cultural transitions.
It brought loneliness in the way of a clash between traditional values and modern lifestyles. Now it creates discomfort, causing difficulty for many young Indians to open up their real self to family members because of fear of being judged or misinterpreted by them.
Social Stress
The extreme pressure to be professionally successful, to get married “on time,” and to maintain social standing pushes Indians into emotional isolation. Most Indians silently experience and simply suffer; speaking their minds is hard and unacceptable within society owing to the taboo surrounding mental illnesses.
The Hidden Cost of Solitude
Solitude is far from just leaving an emotional scar; it affects life much deeper than that:
Physical Health:
Chronic loneliness can be as harmful as smoking 15 cigarettes per day. Cardiovascular diseases are already one of the more worrying health issues in India and for sure, loneliness contributes to a similar risk pool too.
- Mental Well-being: Depression and anxiety are closely linked with solitude. However, despite having realized its serious consequences, mental illness is still a taboo and mainly silent sufferer in countries like India.
- Professional Impact: A few lone individuals can hardly make a productive workforce and grow professionally. In addition, the inability to relate with others outside of work can impose several restrictions on professional scopes.
- Social Consequences: A lonely society would not tend to neighborhood activities or social welfare activities, subsequently watering down what has been, historically, the cornerstone of Indian society.
Reaching Back to Connection
Loneliness is quite a complex issue, yet there are culturally apt ways of reaching out:
Adopt Community Practices
- Engage in local celebrations and community events
- Join a neighborhood bhajan or satsang group
- Engage in community service through local organizations
- Attend cultural events and workshops
Build Intergenerational Bonds
- Teach elderly family members to use technology to keep in touch
- Learn from senior generations’ traditional skills or recipes
- Spend time sharing experiences and listening to others without judgment
Make New Friends
- Join local clubs or sports teams
- Participate in activities of the resident welfare association
- Attend local meetups relevant to your hobbies
- Explore co-living options if new to a city
Seek Professional Help
- Avail online counseling or therapy, which are gaining acceptance in India
- Join support groups and share stories with like-minded individuals
- Use mental health apps and platforms tailored for Indian audiences
Develop Relationships
- Video calls with family members as a scheduled routine
- Sporadic visit plans to hometown
- Connect with old pals through checks
- WhatsApp group creation for discussing sensible messages, not mere forwards
This epidemic of loneliness in India calls for nothing less than individual action and societal response. As we embark on the journey of progress and change, we need to find ways to preserve the age-old support systems that have long been our strength. Remember, it is not the loneliness but the aloneness; feeling lonely does not mean one is alone in their struggle. Millions of Indians are experiencing similar feelings, and reaching out for help is not a sign of weakness but a step towards healing.
