Joy is a feeling that goes and comes. It is impossible to be on the rise all the time, but this is what you need to strive for. The methods and advice offered by psychologists will teach you to enjoy life.
1. Grow Up
Sooner or later, everyone wonders how to make their life more joyful and worthy of living. One of the important aspects in this matter is age. Researchers Steven Pinker and Daniel L. Schacter found that despite all the losses associated with age, older and even older people have a more positive emotional life than younger people. With resources like doctiplus, you can also find additional guidance on building habits that truly support happiness.
The older a person is, the easier it is for him to assess himself, his capabilities and desires. He perceives life more positively due to his experience. Adolescents, on the other hand, are prone to dramatization and negativism. But with age, this passes.
2. Smile
A smile is the easiest way to cheer yourself up and those around you. Try smiling at people all day long and watch their reactions. You will feel goodwill, a desire to help you in some way, to get to know each other, you will see a smile in response and feel a surge of positivity.
A smile can partially solve life problems, support emotional well-being and develop optimism. It reflects faith and striving for the best, and not obsessing over the bad. Even a sluggish smile releases feel-good chemicals in the brain – dopamine and serotonin, writes Meg Selig, author of the books “Silver Sparks: Thoughts on How to Get Older, Wiser and Happier” (2020) and “37 Secrets to Success in Changing Habits” (2009).
3. Remember What Gives You Joy
Life is not only about work and household duties. Remember what brought joy in your younger years, advises psychiatrist Stuart Brown. You may not be playing guitar in your bedroom anymore, but you can remember that carefree state where the outcome wasn’t as important as the emotions you were experiencing back then.
It doesn’t matter what exactly gave joy, roller skating, reading exciting books, conquering sports peaks, dancing. Any activity can be adapted to age and continue to enjoy it. Make a list of the joys of your life.
4. Set Aside Time For Fun
Lack of time often destroys the opportunity to do something for the soul. Anxiety and stress from not doing something do not allow you to relax, and life turns into a treadmill.
Happiness researcher Robert Biswas-Diener, who lectures at Portland State University, gives his students an hour of rest and allows them to do whatever is legal and gives them joy. But for some, it’s a difficult task, even doing their homework during this time, says Robert Biswas-Diener. They are convinced that if they do not do this work, they will be in a state of stress. People think that working to reduce stress will make them happier. This is a mild form of insanity.
It is important to plan time for pleasure and prioritize correctly. You are more important than work or unwashed dishes.
5. Practice Electronic Time-Outs
Your attention is a scarce resource that is never enough. Allocate it wisely so that you can make the most of your time for pleasure, recommends Paul Dolan in the book Happy Someday. Every tweet, text or email distracts from the good experiences and people in our lives, he says.
Studies show that active social media users are less fun than others. This may be due to lifestyle changes and due to negative experiences.
Electronic time-outs are a useful practice. Turn off your phone and other gadgets for at least one day off, while you are doing what you love, so that nothing distracts you. And there will be more time for pleasure.
6. Stay In The Flow
Flow is a state of complete absorption in an activity, when everything else recedes into the background, and the pleasure from the process itself is so great that people will be willing to pay just to do it, explains psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi in the book “Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience”. At such moments, a person controls his consciousness, actions and feels dominance over his own fate. This is the key to success, joy and happiness, the author is sure.
This is the optimal experience we generate when the body and mind are stretched to the limit in an effort to achieve something difficult and valuable. For example, when an athlete makes a last effort to break the record. For each of us, there are thousands of opportunities to discover ourselves and be in the flow.
7. Rejoice In The Little Things
It is possible to live life without experiencing joy. It is possible that it will even be pleasant, but the feeling of pleasure will depend on luck and external circumstances, warns Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. To gain control over the quality of your life, you need to learn to derive joy from everyday activities, the psychologist advises.
Allow yourself to be happy and joyful, because the birds are singing in the garden, because you have been made delicious coffee, because a hydrangea has bloomed on the way to work. Enjoy life here and now. Paying attention to pleasant little things, displace gloomy thoughts.
8. Do Good
Everyone has a certain genetic predisposition to what kind of person we will be, an optimist or a pessimist. But about 40% of the opportunities to become joyful and happy are under our own control, writes Sonja Lubomirsky, Ph.D., in the book “The Psychology of Happiness: A New Approach”. We can reach this state through our own actions.
One of them is good for other people. Do this wherever you are, and the illumination of joy will not leave you. Help a buyer in the store put the products in a bag, buy a bunch of parsley from an old lady at the market, leave her change, point out a mistake to a colleague so that the boss does not find out about it.
9. Be Grateful
Happiness and joy is not something that happens to us. It cannot be bought for money or obtained by force. It does not depend on the events happening around us, but on our interpretation of them, explains psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. If it seems that you do not have something that would give you joy, learn to be grateful and rejoice in what you have.
Daily entries in a gratitude diary about 3-5 good events that happened during the day will help with this, Meg Selig notes. Analyze why this happened. Is it luck, someone’s kindness, hard work, your merit or attitude to it? This practice will significantly increase the number of joyful moments.
10. Forgive Yourself For Mistakes
Don’t get upset, don’t give up, and don’t get depressed if something doesn’t work out. Remind yourself that mistakes are a natural part of life and in the learning process. By allowing yourself to be imperfect, you’ll see that it’s a more productive path, and with less stress. Evaluate experience, the chance to grow and learn new opportunities, not the damage of a mistake.
One of the saddest paradoxes of our time is the availability of pleasant activities that for some reason do not lead to pleasure. We don’t enjoy life more than our ancestors. But everything can be changed. These 10 expert tips will help you turn a boring and meaningless life into a life full of joy.